EXPATITIS...

EXPATIS...............

I have diagnosed myself with this new condition....my own interpretation of what is happening to me and what I have experienced.

Here goes.

I struggle to keep the blog updated due to this condition. I have all the best intentions to keep this blog alive BUT every time I want to expatitis steps in.....Eish she is a bitch.

So many changes are made that it take a while for all to set in and take shape. I think it will be an ongoing condition.

What is expatitis you ask....holy sh*t  not even I, who considers herself inflicted, can truly answer that but I will give it my best shot to explain.

When this process started of relocation to Dubai everything was exciting and frighting. There was so much to do that most of the feelings are put aside to deal with later....you do not even realize this at the time as you think you are dealing emotions at that time.

You take serious stock of  your life (just by packing up) you have to make decisions of what goes what stays and what will be discarded permanently. 

The time in run-up to departure is heavy with visits and goodbye's and promises. Busy busy busy....

Excitement to leave and rejoin Hannes and to be together after 6 months apart. All experiences are new and the brain and heart cannot take all in, so here goes to putting aside to handle another day again.....

Arrival in Dubai was bliss. Good to be together and all this new and exciting things to do and experience....Lots of felling here again BUT again put aside to deal with another day.....

Finding a new apartment and decorating and stabilizing a new "home"  Jippee exciting stuff... New feelings and experiences too much to deal with so again...put aside to deal with another day.

You change with the time and place you live in. 

Experiences here are "moment" things and difficult to explain and put into words. 

Sometimes it is also just too much effort as Expatitis makes you very very tired.

Start missing family and friends BUT too busy to deal with that now so put aside to deal with another day.....

You find wonderful things in your new place of residence, and also a few things that are not so nice, Overall everything is good and fine and dandy.

You have to learn to drive on the other side of the road than what you were used to. You have to find a hairdresser, dentist, grocery store, new products and names etc etc etc. The list is endless. All you knew has to be relearned. A small example is easy reader (we call then clicks no 1) are difficult to find....The "eye" stores do not stock them at all. Only at pharmacies...and then they are very expensive.

You choose meat from 5 different countries.....butter form at least 5 countries, the eggs here all have dark yellow yolk even orange.... Milk is not always marked as cow's mild and you get camel milk here in all the stores as well. Laban is not Arabic for milk is means buttermilk...... You can NEVER ask for directions. Nobody can help you. Either they cannot understand or they really did not know. The  first day of the week is Sunday. You go to church on Fridays....The beach is full every day with men woman and children.

Children here are everywhere. on their bikes and scooters in the street and until very late at night. Alcohol is licensed. No disorderly conduct in public is tolerated. Loud aggressive behavior will land you in jail. Police here have all the power and execute the jail time as well. Quick court appearance and off to jail you go. As an expat you will be deported immediate after jail time. Courts are only for very big court cases.....

I can go on and on and on.

I have  learned to be very tolerant of the new culture I am living in as I have made it my business to try and understand all the customs. Some I find very appealing.

Ok that list can go on and on and I think all of you are clever enough to get the picture.

In time a form of "reality" sets in......I say form as it is MY REALITY.

I love Dubai and it's people AND I will always be a South African but  I have become very guarded... I  check what I say about South Africa to people in the UAE as I want to be a good ambassador. So some things I tend to leave out......AM I WRONG? I am very guarded when I give my feeling to my SA family and friends about what I reading the newspapers...Firstly because I cannot trust all that is printed and also because it is met with a lot of sceptism or I get the feeling I do not have the right to be opinionated. I have had comments of "but you left us SO IT IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM ANYMORE....or you did not care to stick around....or you are so lucky to be in Dubai......or you are earning foreign currency so you must be swimming in it......" I have" lost"  to right to have an opinion...Why? We still support SA finacially (small) and we still pay tax....

So I get guarded and proactive (eat your heart out DOK) and tend to walk the politically correct line.

Day to day life has normalized here. I have to do my chores and runs the house and keep myself occupied. All the people you meet here are "in-transit". It can never be a permanent place of staying as the visa's do not cater for that. So most friendships are dealt with in the same manner. 

I have been very lucky to meet fantastic friends here and these are friendships that will go on for ever. You tend to lean must more on your friends here than what you were used to AND they all have expatitis.....in some form or shape.

I MIS everybody...THIS IS THE BIGGEST CONDITON IN EXPATITIS.

You have HUGE longings that you have never experienced before. Mine are only for people and not places.

Some months I could have bought a ticket to see them with what my cell bill was like......

Facebook is good and dandy and e-mails are fine BUT I need the physical contact.

You miss the regular contact to stay updated in their lives and to be up to date on all gongs on.... Some how 'n computer can never full fill this need. I have had comment of " why do you miss me, you decided to go away...."

Bouts of "depresion" or anxiety are not strange. Loss of interest in Everything is common....

System overload is always lingering.

Finacially I have had to change...I have to budget. That alone can give you expatitis.... It cost us a fortune to do this relocation . You find it out as you go and even the best planning could not have warned us.

I wach the exchange rate like a hawk. We still have comitments in SA and we are STILL paying tax so the exchange rate is very important in when to tranfer money to SA.

The world becomes so much smaller and fantastic new opportunity arise and new countries to explore...Exciting stuff. Just an example. Sri Lanka is close and very cheap at the moment to travel. Maybe in the near future.

In a nutshell Expatitis is the positive and the negative experiences and feelings having a massive "fight" in your head and heart......... It tends to debilitate you.

You also now have to deal with all those issues you put away originally to deal with later. It like washing washing that has been in a bag for a year....

 I think the condition is temporary but I cannot give a time on how long it will last......

All in all I know we have made the right choice and Dubai is the best place for us at the moment. Who knows what the future holds....

Just remeber everyday I miss you all very very much BUT am  happy here too (SOUT PIEL COMES TO MIND)

Lets keep our fingers crossed this condition is really temporary.

L

SOCCER WORLD CUP 2010.

AIYOBA...IN DUBAI

Dubai really got the soccer fever. Every club and pub had a big screen and tent put up to allow people to watch all the matches. It drew huge crowds and every day all the taxi drivers and general public had lots to talk about and who supports who.

Barasti (where this photo was taken) is a very popular hang out as it is a beach bar, very lani and laid back and on the beach and always has crowds.

 Rossouw Dian and Ettiene (friend and also now adopted son who came to visit) went for the opening ceremony and also the Bafana Bafana game.

DIAN, ROSSI AND ETTIENE

These three had a wonderful night. You buy a bucket of beers and enjoy the game. They had to wait in a very long queue to get in. Insidee it was just vuvuzela's and a huge party atmosphere. There were very proud to be South African and had a huge party. They also had loss of voice the next day...so I can only imagine the amount of screaming that went on.

After the game all you could hear in the streets of Dubai were vuvuzela's....

LAST GAME OF 2010....NETHERLANDS VERSUS SPAIN.
What an amazing show...I was very proud to see the show South Africa had put on. I also hear from all in SA that the atmosphere was amazing.

WELL DONE SOUTH AFRICA

HANNES AND I KITTED OUT TO SUPPORT NETHERLANDS

I had such a day looking for the kit in Dubai....there are soccer fans here but it seems the clothing was in short supply or either all sold out. Dian and I went to Satwa in 49C heat and started to cruise all the sport shops.  We found BUT only certain sizes were available.   Hannes's shirt was a bit on the small side....

We chose to support Netherlands due to Hannes's roots originate there. I heard of the Octopus predictions.....don't know what I think of that...................

I am also not so sure orange is my colour......

DIAN AND ROSSI KITTED OUT

Ok so these 2 are know also rearing to go.....

HANNES AND THE 2 BOYS

A small private joke had them in stitches.....Sorry cannot divulge that on the blog....Even our very own SA Vuvuzela in hand...

THE WHOLE FAMILY ( MISSING JC IN THIS PHOTO!!!!!!!!!)

We went to the Movenpick Hotel in JBR to watch the Closing ceremony and the game. We were a hit in the bar as we were the ONLY people kitted out in team support colours.
I have to admit I am not a soccer fan and know absolutely nothing of the rules and game plans, BUT to be part of that from this distance was fantastic. Would have been so nice to watch it with JC joining us as well, but I just have always now that we as a full family unit will be at certain times and I will always miss the one not there.

Even if you move to anywhere in the world you always stay a South African and I just wish the best for SA as we plan to return  some day after all our travels and expeditions .
So the world cup is over and I  just wish that al the goodwill and good feelings in SA stay as it was during the world cup.
All for today.
L

SURPRISE.................. SURPRISE

MY 50TH BIRTHDAY CAKE...

I have just had the mot fantastic birthday of all.....For my birthday Hannes broke tradition COMPLETELY and surprised me with a 5 day holiday to one of the Maldivian islands. He was so good at keeping all the arrangement secret that I only found out the day we were leaving. He even packed my suitcase.

I was blown away, and also flown away...............

Now all of you know me and my birthday tradition has ALWAYS been that Hannes gives me some serious bling...I tend to look like a fully lit Christmas tree with all my bling AND I wear them all, anywhere and anytime. I am not sorry for missing some bling this year , as it has been one of my dreams to see the Maldives.

The flight was not that long and I just closed my eyes and slept the whole way.

Arriving in Maldives takes some adjustment. Firstly, we now live in very very hot part of the world, BUT we do not have humidity. That makes the heat bearable....Maldives however is 15degreesC cooloer than Dubai But the humidity is very high. The airport is typical on an Island. very clean but basic. To get from the airport to hotel is either a speed boat ride or a sea plane transfer. We had a very smart and fast huge speedboat.

This was the first sight I had of the hotel on approach to the KANDOOMA ISLAND

On arrival by speedboat, this is what you see.....It resembles very large coconuts. My excitement was very very big....I could not wait to get off the boat and put my toes into the white sand... Yo are greeted at the door with ice-cold towels and fruit cocktails. At this stage I was still very "un-tanned"   Boy did I rectify that problem quickly....

VIEW FROM HOTEL LOBBY TO BOAT HOUSE.

This is not a postcard it is exactly as it is.....picture perfect. Words cannot describe....

BIRTHDAY DRINKS ON THE ROOFTOP

Editing these foto's are absolutely NOT working so do your own thing with what the photo's mean....I am just going to speak from the heart......

It was a fantastic holiday AND I had to come to one conclusion. I am so very fortunate to be able to share all this with my first husband......and still enjoy his company.

I am not the straightest pencil in the box and tend to live in very vivid colours.......BUT the 2 of us still really enjoy each others company and can have so much fun.

Maldives was always a very big wish for me and here it all came true. Needless to say I did not want to leave at all BUT that is just typical me. Every single place we go to on holiday I am always looking for ways to extend the stay....

The food was good and the people very very friendly. We did not venture off our island at all as it was never needed.

We did snorkeling from our doorstep beach and went on the snorkeling excursions to other small islands as well.

All in all we just had a very lad back and relaxing holiday. Every day we went for massages and ate ourselves into a stupor.

The 5 days flew past in a wink.....

THANK YOU HANNES FOR BEING SO VERY SPECIAL...I LOVE YOU LOTS.

A LITTLE MORE ABOUT ME PERSONALLY WITH ALL THIS GOINGS ON IN OUR LIVES.

It is no easy to be an expat....It is not for sissies at all. I really love being here and enjoy my life (even if it has turned onto its head at times). The big but comes in with what we have to compromise and what you have to give up.

Family and friends are ALWAYS the biggest hassles. I tend to miss them more here than what I did living in SA, and also seeing them very seldom. It is just the expanse of the oceans that divide us that ou really feel. I think there s something in the aircraft filters that tackles you brain to make you miss them more.

Friends you make in the new country are very special BUT you have to be very careful as they also tend to move away from time to time. IT took a year for us to get settled into a social group here and his group is just about only south Africans. It s not planned or orchestrated it just tends to happen. I now have very special friends here and we all will eventually meet up back in SA again.

I have to wonder how this will change me. What will I be when I get back to my SA family and friends again. Surly I cannot be the same as before...or will I ????

All of you know how much I hate exercise................I HAVE JOINED A GYM HERE....Now this story is funny (or at least i thought so)  here goes.

The Carlton Ritz Hotel is just across the road form us. I went there one day all "Marina Mary" attitude and asked to join there sport and hotel facilities....BIG was my surprise on the costs....I can buy a car in SA for that money and it needs and will only be membership for a year.  Just remember I can also get 15% discount of all food and beverage at the hotel to.....Holy cow I can never eat or drink enough to get my money's worth...VERY FUNNY.   I left with exactly the same attitude as I left.....That did not deflate or deter my attitude one bit. ( For all who know me you will understand the gut spa and attitude I try to convey here. It is also the funny part)

The Movenpick hotel is just as near and off I went there to enquire.   Happiness.....I am now a fully fledged member of Movenpick and can gym 24/7 ( yeah right...just up my alley...is this maybe funny...)

I go every day ,OK I skip some days...., But I can gym, sauna, steam bath, have 5 star hotel bathroom facilities, 15% discount on spa and beauty treatment etc.

My membership card is GOLD......only bleddie gold card I have now..............

So I am now a gym bunny and not vegetating on the couch....Very proud of myself.

Another story that comes to mind on expat living here is the driving on the right..........I remeber the first time a took the car and went grocery shopping. All went well until all groceries were packed in the bot and me ready to leave. As I got into the car I realised I have no steering wheel in front of me...Confusion and embarrassment deluxe.  I had got into the wrong side of the car....Not to let anybody else realise I have just been a super "doos" I just sat there for 10 minutes and the calmly got out the car and walked around to the left side and voila. have steering wheel now and drove away.

The sad side is my kids.....I miss them badly and when they do visit it takes so very long to reconnect again. Maybe it is normal life that they grow up and move out of your daily life, BUT this just makes it feel so very final, and as if you have hastened the process.

Of our friends here have finished their contracts and are heading back to SA..It seems you are always saying goodbye..........

Hannes and I however are still very happy to stay here for a god couple of years depending on contract holding and the money side and as it is the middle east we have to always question the stability of the region.

I am lucky to have lots of visitors which make the longings easier. I have just had Ettiene ( a friend from SA)stay for about a month and he is now coming back to Dubai as he secured himself a job here. Barbara will be here in a weeks time.

It is very very hot here now and the days average 48C. This is not a joke.....and thank heaven for air con.

OK all for this one.

Miss and love you all very very much

L

SAY WHAT ! ! ! ! ! !

THE LITTLE DUDE.

One of my terapins in the bowl, having a "tan" under the light.

Ok so it has been 4 months since my last entry...but I am now as this little dude show's in the photo. Little relaxed and ready to blog again. I went through a rough patch...no not rough, depressed patch. I had the total feeling of "so what now" I know it always happens to me as soon as all the dust settles.....I am very good in tight situations BUT when all goes back to normal I tend to fall apart...What is this?

I survived Christmas and it was so good to have all the bys here.  During that time I got the swine flu....not fun, but made it through....

I did not like to say goodbye to JC and Dian as they went back to SA to go on with their lives. It feels like the whole ocean is a barrier between us. Actualy very silly as I would not have seen them more regurlarly is we still stayed in SA.
I realise that the kids get big and lead their own lives, I have nothing against it either, so why do I take good bye's so badly. I normally pick a fight the few days before any one leaves.....The boys were so used to it when they went back to boarding school on Sundays, I got crabby from the morning.....

THE DUBAI MARINA EARLY MORNING

Dian went for a walk early one morning and took this photo of the marina. The high rises are JBR (Jumeira beach Residence) we stay in one of them. Such a lovely calm and peaceful veiuw. How can I get "down" when living in a place like this??????????? Easy for me to say so now...a month ago I would not even have been able to apreciate this photo. Just goes to show. Time is all one needs. Own time to get all the "filing" done. I needed to sit back and have 'n perfectly fantastic depro..... I could not find the words to put n the blog so decided to ignore the blog for a while. Although I missed writing about our life here in the UAE, and getting feedback from you all, I just ........................ENOUGH

THE VIEUW FROM THE MARINA TO JBR.

I just love this photo that Thelma took when she was visiting here. The yachts are all so clean and neat and well kept. Thema and  went for a walk (10km) around the marina this day. Perfect weather and perfect company. We even had a boat ride with the marina security as I told them she is a travel fotographer...They took us around the marina in a little boat....

SOUK MADINAT FROM THE WATERWAYS

Another of my favourite places in Dubai is Souk Madinat. It has all these waterways around the Souk and hotels. Lots of little coffee shops and restaurants at the water edge.

CHRISTMAS DAY 2009

Fot the frst time in 4 years we were al together. The boys are really clowning around here but it jut gives the atmosphere we had here while they were here. All fun and laughs and so good to be together again. We had a traditional Christmas lunch with too much food (as always). I invited another girl (S. African) as she was new in Dubai and knew nobody. She kindly took this foto for us.

With chistmas presents we did something new this year and it was fun. We put our names in a hat. Each one drew a name form the hat and had to buy a prezzie for only that person, and it had to be only 100 dirhams. In Dubai that is very challenging.

OUR CHRISTMAS TREE AND PREZZIES.

The tree is small and "plastic" (First for us, we aways had a real tree...) but it did the job and had lovely flashing lights. I decorated it a little arabian with the decorations (Purple and cream and gold) Hannes received a book (he loves reading) I got a Zen garden, JC got a pair of shoes, Rossouw got piggy bank and other smal stuff and Dian got architecture books. We all were very thrilled with the challenge of gift buying and receiving. Exat life is pricey when it comes to flying the kids up and down....and then also to get their visa's. I think Christmas form now on will be very small gifts as I think we tend to spend too much money on the gifts in any case.

HATTA POOLS

We went camping between Christmas and new year........Yes my dears CAMPING. We have all the gear and it was interesting and challenging. We took a "off road " manual and went riding in the wadi's (river beds) It is beautiful and that is were most of the veggies and fruit are grown. It is very rural and the people are still very "old school" but very friendly. The Prado took some hammering in the wadi's as some areas you have to drive over rocks...Hannes did a fine job. Myself and the boys had to get out from time to time to guide Hannes through the rocky patches.

Hatta pools  is a collection of springs in the rocks (as seen on the photo) The water is crystal clear, and as it was in our winter, very very cold. We all went for a swim the next morning. Hannes and the boys did a skinny dipping number ( I did not watch...too afraid of what I might see......) After they were done Hannes and I went for a swim. Talk about invigorating....but you have to come clean and it is the only washing water around. Camping in the UAE is great BUT it is in nature totally. You can camp anywhere..........

VISITORS AT OUR CAMP SITE.

Later the evening we saw lights approach us through the wadi. Out of a 4x4 were 4 youngsters. How they manage to drive that terrain at night I do not now. Dian is having such a laugh on the photo as they just "pull in" Sit around the fire, have some eats and drinks and leave. We could not understand each other at all as they only speak arabic. But the gestures were friendly and it is the arabic culture to always give eats and drinks to all when they arrive. They returned in the early hours of the morning but when they saw we were sleeping they apologised and left again. The emirate's are night people. Maybe due to the heat during the day. Shops are open till 11 at night (normally) but they take a siesta from 13hoo to 16hoo.

BARBS COMES TO VISIT

Barbs came to visit us after new year. She spent 10 days with us. very good to see her and do all the catching up.

Barbs is dressed in "snow gear" as she and Dian went to the ice bar. You get all dressed up and enter the ice bar.

ICE BAR

Every thing is  ice. The table's and chairs and even the menu is frozen onto the table. The ice sculptures are changed every few weeks. It is very cold inside. There is also a window from the icebar to the insie ot he mall. People passing by always look in to see what's happening inside....

RAIN DUBAI

This is a very rare sight. It had been raining heavy and this is the after effect. We only have 4 days rain per year BUT it was a little more this year. Thelma took this foto as we were traveling to Sjarjah. I also think that they do not spend too much effort in drainage systems on the roads as it is not really needed. During our rainy times there are many accidents on the road...Not a good time to travel. Rather stay home until the water subsides.

THELMA AND NICO

Nico and Thelma also came for a visit. Nico had to go to New York and Thema stayed behind with us. We had lots and lots of fun and TOO MUCH LAUGHING.

CAMEL RACES IN DUBAI

Thema and myself were having coffee with the race officials. We went to see the camel races (always a favourite) and we strlled around to get nice photo opportunity for Thelma. The oficials saw us and invited us for coffee. You sit on the ground ( do not show the soles of your feet as it is regarded as very rude) and they then pour arabic coffee until yu feel yu have had enough. To indicate that you have had enough you have to "wiggled" the cup fro side to side.....If you do not so this.............You will have more coffee...

These oficials are there to see that all of the race goes by the book. The winning camel is tested for stimulants immeaditely after the race . The winning camel is also painted with safron from the head to the neck.

Thelma and I also got a lick of paint......................

MARIA AND ROSSOUW

Maria is the daughter I alays talk about. She was and exchange student wh stayed with us for a year about 12 years ago. She is one of the family. She used to play rugby with the boys (they were still small). It was so special that she took the effort and time to come and see us again. Sh slotted into the house as if she had never left.

TIM AND MARIA IN THE DESERT

Tim is Maria's other half. The two of them had a ball on the desert safari althogh Tim was still very sore from a sun tan the prevcious day. They put on a brave face and smiled for the camera.

It was good to meet Tim finally.

This blog has been just to pick up the pieces again and get myself into a writing rythym again. So much happens and so many experiences (small and big) happen and it is difficult to think about them and write now as it feels as if I am getting to now this blog again.

I hope the good feeling is here to stay, as I do not want to vegetate for 4 months again.

As I said before expat life is not for sissies....I realise there is much to gain but also so much to loose. I miss my boys, family and friends badly.... My I-POD is the best thing there is (Although I now want an

I-PHONE) Ib the difficult days I put the earphones in and blast the music.....It is then s quick and easy t clean the house....before you know the work is done.

Speaking of house work....I will now be able to train any domestic woker. I have it all down to pat and am doing a great job, AND it does not invlove my whle life.....

I have met friends here and it is good to have people to visit. I also make it a mission to find the cheaper shopping areas in Dubai. For any tourist Dubai is expensive in the malls. I have never been a mall rat and I am having a ball in all the older areas.

The areas look very dodgy BUT you are 100% safe. You can even get a guy to carry all your shopping around. I even found a WIMPY.

I bake and cook alot and enjoy it. Home made Ice-cream (thanks Sonja and girls) is a big hit with Hannes , Rossouw and dinner guests.

The summer has started and the temp. is cimbing. Was 40 C yesterday.

We have had the curtains made for the whole appartment and it just looks lovely. I do not now how we lived without them for 8 months.............

Now I am babling...........

Hopefully next blog will be sooner than later.

L